On a lighter note..

Foreword: if you're not interested in nail varnish then do not read. Haha ! :)

I wanted to post a little product review, on some Barry M nail paints. I loveee Barry M and started buying the nail paints quite a while ago, but have recently started buying a lot more of Barry M in general thanks to my friend (Dianne Day Dreams). She gave me one of her Barry M blushers and i adore it !
I own quite a collection of nail paints now, my favourites so far probably being 302 Fushcia, 262 Bright Red, and my most recent purchase, 304 Mint Green.

This is 304, which i really love ! The picture isn't great, i just found it on Google, and i have to say it's slightly lighter and more mintier in real life. The whole jade/mint green colour is massively in trend and has been for quite a while, with a few big labels picking up on it such as Chanel and Mac, both of which had a hugely popular shade of green. The thing about those though, they cost a bomb and are quite difficult to get hold of with them being so popular.
I originally spotted American Apparel's nail lacquer in 'Office' a couple of months ago, which is very similar to the Mac and Chanel shades, and i was planning on buying that until the link on the website mysteriously dissapeared. I still have no idea how to get back to the nail section now. So when i spotted the Barry M version for around half the price i couldn't resist ! And true to form for all Barry M nail paints, the colour comes out as 'bottle colour' after one or two coats and usually stays on chip-free for 3 or 4 days. It would probably last a lot longer but im notorious for biting my nails, and i also tend to chip my nails a lot at work !

I've got my eye on a few more colours and will be stocking up next time i get paid ! Until then, let me know what you think :)
Jac
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Ira Procuratio

If you are one of my close friends or have spent a lot of time with me over the past year you will know that sometimes i can get very easily agitated. Little things make me angry or stressed, and it's not something i can help, or like.
For my new years res i promised that i would try and be calmer and to not let little things bother me. Needless to say, as all new year resolutions do, it went down the pan after about a week. But lately i've been thinking and i really should learn to not get soo stressed over things. Somebody said to me the other day 'life is too short..' and it made me think, a lot. Is life too short to be upset or angry ? Should we resist holding grudges or voicing opinions in fear of upsetting people.. because 'life is too short' ?
Amongst close friends i find myself to be the one that says what everyone else was thinking. I'm the one people nudge and say 'ask if we can do this..' or 'will you tell them for me..' and i sometimes think its a good thing, that i'm not afraid to stand up for myself. In school i was bullied and would never stand up for myself, i was the quietest girl in my group of 'friends'. Now i've grown up a bit and learned to make myself heard, i feel relieved to be able to get things off my chest and not be afraid of what others might think. But on the other hand i sometimes feel like life just might be too short to pick up on little things and to argue over what others might let slide. It's a tough one.
I live with my grandparents and when i was younger i saw their house as a haven, where i was spoiled rotten with endless biscuits and pocket money and i could do anything i pleased. Now i'm older and i don't exactly see eye to eye with them all the time. But i've learned to keep my mouth shut, and to just let it go over my head. I've seen my friends scream and argue with their parents to no avail, and i've noticed it's much easier to just nod along. This being said, i bitch about it endlessly when i'm not around them, but that does no harm. That causes no arguments. It's just me moaning. Why can't i do that with everything else ? I've poured drinks in peoples faces, i've screamed in peoples faces, mostly because of little pathetic things, or because of something they've done or said to a friend. Why do i feel the need to fight other people's battles ? I have a feeling it comes from things i've seen or heard in past years, more deep rooted things but i wont go into that. You shouldn't let the past bother you. Because after all, life is too short, isnt it ?

Candy

Sweet as sugar,
hard as candy,
you aren't the god i wanted you to be.

spiders running, running everywhere,
white hot wit and dangerous flare,
your face isnt pretty.

more indecisive everyday you grow,

crumbling with delight i swallowed you down,

every last speck of me was gone.

trickling with remorse now you shudder,
and i,
i will be happy. i hate the sound of your voice.